I honestly dont know where to go from this. The constant pessimism is just sending me back into that shit place I was at last year. Everything is just bad bad bad to you, and you’re dragging everyone around you down too. Everyone around you being me. Seen as you keep pushing everyone else away. It’s hard to say it but you’re doing it to me too. I can’t keep doing this and putting up with it, and I’m getting closer and closer to snapping. I’m literally just waiting for your brother and sister to get back now to see if things improve at all. But for some reason I dont see anything improving at all. I’ve been in these deep dark places before. I know they’re not nice. But you’ve got to just listen to me and stop giving excuses for you to just stay pissed off at the world and stop feeling so sorry for yourself all the time and just pick yourself up  and get on with things. Make something for yourself. Make something out of yourself and just prove to everyone that you can actually do something with your life for yourself and not need people there the whole way to help you along. I cant take this much more. I dont know what to say to you any more because its never the right thing. I cant stop you from getting upset any more. And you’re just constantly getting upset and crying about i dont know what. Yeah I can understand you miss your mum and everything, but you’ve just got to deal with it the best you can, get on with life so that she will end up being proud of you for just picking yourself up and not letting anyone keep you down. I dont know what else to say tbh. I cant say anything else.